What you need to know about boys and internet pornography

I don’t have a blueprint for this brave new online world where just typing ‘breastfeeding’ into a search engine produces a minefield of lurid possibilities.

Steve Biddulph, author of Raising Boys & Raising Girls wrote an article in the Sydney Morning Herald recently that really resonated with me. Highlighting the fact that being exposed to internet pornography can shape a boy’s perceptions about sexuality and what’s appropriate.

My boys can already flick through my iPad faster than me (at 17mths & 3yrs old!). Soon, they’ll know more about the internet than I do. And that scares me…

Michael Guglielmucci had an incredible impact on the lives of thousands of people as he battled with Cancer. He performed one of the most powerful songs I’ve ever heard – ‘Healer,’ with Hillsong Church. Then came his shocking confession – not only did he not have Cancer but he had, in fact, been struggling with an addiction to adult Pornography since the age of 12. A Pastor’s son. From a good home. I wasn’t angry about it. I didn’t feel any condemnation towards him. I saw a 12 year old boy exposed to something he wasn’t equipped to deal with. By his friends.

So, although I can keep my boys accountable at home… I can’t be with them everywhere they go.

Then it hits me.

One of the most important gifts I can give to my boys is to instil in them a genuine respect for women and a desire to protect their physical and emotional wellbeing.

I am their first love. The first girl they ever kissed and the one who will shape their view of women more than any other woman they’ll meet.

My actions and reactions teach them what’s okay and what’s not okay. Equally as important is that they see the way their hero, my hubby, speaks to me and loves me.

My heart for my boys is that they will be known for the way they respect and honour women. That they will hold women in such high regard that the idea of seeing them degraded or harmed is as appalling to them as it is to me.