It’s one of the most powerful movie moments in history – in my opinion. Not because of special effects, cinematography, eloquent scripting or romantic fervour.
It happened deep within the ruins of the World Trade Centre, during the 2006 Olive Stone movie of the same name.
Sergeant John McLoughlin is trapped, losing all hope of rescue, when he has a vision of his wife. I can’t find it anywhere on youtube, but here’s the script:
‘John (Nicolas Cage): Did I ever love you enough, honey?
I mean, did I love you good like I was supposed to?
What the hell happened?
Donna (Maria Bello): I think we had it, John. It was in the moments.
Happens to most people, I guess. Me, with the kids, and you with the department.
Somewhere along the way, I guess we kind of stopped looking at each other.’
It was a rare ‘non-glossed’ Hollywood moment. So raw and real. It haunted me.
We’d been married for about 18 months, still inhabiting that newlywed glow.
I couldn’t imagine it happening to us. I mean, we had the perfect marriage (18 months in).
Fast forward 7 years and I get it now. Not because we have a terrible marriage, because we don’t. But I see how easily the moments slip by unnoticed and uncelebrated, if you let them.
There are, of course, the big events that will always stay with you, but the moments I treasure most are fleeting and easily missed.
Tyson crawls into our bed early one morning and whispers ‘can I have a mummy cuddle?’
Amongst a mess of peas and chicken, Jack looks up at me with a big, toothy grin that speaks a thousand words he doesn’t even know yet.
The boys are asleep, work’s done for the day and hubby puts his arm around me as we watch whatever’s on tv.
I know that at the end of my life, it will be moments like these that warm my heart. Nothing else will matter. Life really is best spent living ‘in the moments.’