A couple of months ago, hubby & I did something pretty extraordinary… we went out alone (ie minus kids) to celebrate our 8 year wedding anniversary.
We felt like a couple of teenagers holdings hands (no pram to push!), partaking in uninterrupted conversation, sitting in a nice (not-so-child-friendly) local restaurant. As we sat there, enjoying the serenity, eating our meals, without once getting up to settle boisterous kids, or spoon feed a reluctant mouth, it felt strangely familiar. Like something we had done before… long, long ago.
And of course we had… in our life together BC (Before Children).
Then we did the maths and realised the last time we had been out together alone (ie minus children) was exactly one year ago to the day – on our 7 year anniversary.
That’s a long time between drinks.
So, in the afterglow of our anniversary dinner, we promised each other a date night once a month.
I’d barely spoken the thought out loud when my parents pounced on the opportunity to have 2 of their grandkids to themselves once a month. They’re very loving and proud Grandparents.
And so began our monthly child free nights and… it’s amazing! I love my little people more than can be expressed in words but my goodness, it’s nice to have a break once in a while.
We’ve been out just the two of us and we’ve been out with friends. It doesn’t really matter. It’s all about enjoying adult company and conversation and rediscovering the person you fell in love with. I can’t believe we didn’t think of it sooner!
It’s been a great opportunity to take stock of where we’re at and make sure we’re still on the same page (thankfully we are!). Seeing marriages around us become unravelled has really highlighted to me the importance of date night.
After all, we’re in this thing together, hubby and I. We’re a team and every now and then, it’s important to rise above the mounting pile of washing, squeaky toys and tantrums to remember why we decided to ‘do life together’ 8 years ago. After all, everything’s better when you do it together… especially date night.
Well written Anette. My Husband and I have been married 28 yrs last week and I can’t stress enough the importance of date night and romance. That together with communication is one of the key elements to a long and happy marriage.
Great piece Annette. Makes me recall what my wife & I did years ago when our 4 were little uns. We were young farmers short on cash and the cost and hassle of baby sitters made date nights a bit rare. Then I heard a great idea somewhere. We teamed up with another young couple whom we loved and knew shared the same core attitudes and values and committed with each other that if either couple wanted or needed a night out then one partner of the other couple would come to our place and mind the family. We did it for about 10 -12 years, till our eldest were old enough to be left with the responsibility and it worked a treat. We always knew we had our kids safe and there was no extra cost which at that stage of our lives made a significant difference. The added bonus is an enduring friendship with the couple we paired with in this exercise and good friendships between our (combined) eight children.
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