Parents and teenagers live in different worlds and their challenge is finding common ground. Common ground is a place where the arguing stops, even if only for a moment. Finding common ground can be as simple as a well-timed look, an in-house joke, a quick hug, a catch up about sport or a trip to the shops via a milkshake bar. Finding common ground confirms, “I can still find something I like about you even when you are totally annoying me!”
I am frightened by my son’s temper. He flies off the handle, swearing, punching things. He can erupt over the smallest things. I don’t know why he is so angry. He’s not a child anymore and it does frighten me when he’s out of control. He is much bigger than I am and he’s getting so strong.
So, your young person doesn’t want to go to counselling? You are faced with the challenge of convincing them it’s a good idea. At this point you’re probably feeling like it’s going to be as difficult as selling ice to an Eskimo. Your young person may be saying that they don’t want to talk to anyone, that there isn’t a problem or that it won’t help anyway. These are challenging mindsets to get through.