My Dream Holiday

In my life BC (Before Children), my idea of complete relaxation was luxuriating beside a pool on a tropical island, reading a book, or ordering room service and getting up only to go to the bathroom. Sigh… good times.

Nowadays, the idea of going away is exhausting! Packing for 4 people whilst remaining under the baggage limit (or boot space, depending on the mode of transport), travelling with 2 boys for whom 20 minutes in a car seat is a big ask, then playing ‘helicopter mum’ as both boys are drawn by some magnetic force to the water’s edge, despite their complete inability to swim. I can’t remember the last time I finished a book – Jack literally ‘devours’ my books, leaving teeth marks and saliva in his wake.

No, my idea of relaxation is much closer to home now.

It’s almost comical to me that the once mundane task of grocery shopping by myself has now become my last bastion of solitude and serenity.

Grocery shopping with 2 boys is like releasing a ballistic missile and manoeuvring my trolley to catch the debris as it falls.

Tyson has to have his own ‘little’ trolley, which is a great innovation by Coles to keep little boys feeling ‘helpful’ and therefore out of mischief… For about 2 aisles.

Jack was once content to sit in the trolley seat but now wants to roam free and pull random items off shelves.

By the time I get to the checkout, Tyson has usually gone AWOL and Jack is writhing in my arms, while I pull ‘little surprises’ out of the trolley that ‘someone’ has snuck in there. I’m frazzled to say the least. So when I get home, if hubby says: ‘you forgot the milk,’ you’ll forgive me for not always responding in a warm, loving manner.

Nowadays, grocery shopping by myself is more relaxing than a tropical holiday with the whole family. It’s even right up there with a full body massage for relaxation. Wandering slowly down the aisles. Reading labels. Discovering new products. Returning to previous aisles without causing chaos and confusion. Getting through my whole shopping list and not forgetting anything in the rush to get the heck out. It’s just so… relaxing!

Funny how things change.

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